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woo...tang. lol. | I can't just let them die alone... Can I? |
I found out a few days ago that my adoptive mother has leukemia and it's not looking well. I'm married now, and live several hours away. I want to visit her so badly, but my husband doesn't want to go. She is scared about me making the long drive by myself, and made me promise not to. I honestly don't know anyone else who can come with me, and I can't just come alone anyway because I did that a few months ago when my adoptive father's alzheimer's took a turn for the worse.
I honestly am wondering if deep down I want to go at all. I guess the child in me thinks that if I just ignore this it will go away, and I can go on knowing that I can see them anytime I want to. A huge part of me is furious with my husband for not being in the least bit supportive. Does that mean he doesn't love me? I REALLY couldn't even begin to handle a divorce right now on top of everything else.
What should I do? |
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jane dough
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Yes, your hubby is being selfish. I understand that's she's your adoptive mother, but she's still your mother. How would he feel if it were the other way around?
Just get packed, fill the car with gas and tell him your going. And go. Maybe he will change his mind at the last minute, after he realizes how serious you are.
He NEEDS to be more supportive. That's part of the marriage process (thru sickness and health) (doesn't say for who tho).
Be brave & keep your chin up. :) |
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Candy A
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Well,
Take a piece of paper and on one side mark all the reasons you should go and on the other side write all the reasons you cannot go. Then from there, based on your own information , you can make a sound choice with no regrets.
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Jalal P
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ur husbands a loser for not supporting u. |
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Megafunk
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Its very selfish of your husband not to take your feelings into consideration. I don't think its grounds for divorce, but he should make the effort for something thats so important to you. Explain to him how much this means to you, but don't put him on a guilt trip "if you cared, you'd do it, etc." Its his own choice at the end of the day. If I were you, I would drive anyway, but tell them you got the train/bus/plane. |
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Britt 22
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Girl you better get down there to see your mother before it is to late because then you will regret it!! I would just go down there for awhile and deal with your husband later but definitely that needs to be addressed you really should go honestly think about if something happened before you got to see her again how would you feel!?!?! |
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Atheist
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It's not that he doesn't love you, it's probably that he doesn't see it as "his problem."
I'd be upset, but I don't think it's divorce time.
Try making the drive with a friend. Do you have any other family members? Other children you grew up with as brothers or sisters?
I send both of your parents my deepest well wishes and I do hope that they get better.
You're a noble woman and I know you'll make the right decision because regardless of your husband, they're still your family and they supported you at your weakest time. |
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SR13
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Sounds like you should go no matter what people say to you. If you feel bad now then you will feel far worse later for not visiting. Screw your husbands view on the matter, it's your choice not his. |
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Beanie
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He should support this if you really want to. I would go and see her, if you don't you may regret it. |
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