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Happy Little Trees
I was diagnosed this week with CLL. How do I tell my 13 year old daughter?
Stage 3, have not yet begun any treatment. I am still in shock..please, any suggestions on how to tell my daughter? We are very close and she knows nothing up to this point, other than I was not feeling well.
There really is no good way to tell someone you have an illness..but you can soften the blow by maybe taking her out to eat or some other fun activity.When you guys start in talking about more serious things..You can tell her then.Not like,"Guess what?"..but more like,"You know I love you and we've always been very close?.." Then just ease into it ...
Ember Halo
oh no! i'm so sorry
i'm not sure how to tell her, except be upfront & straight with her, tell her everything you know, and reassure her that even though you have some tough times ahead battling it, things will work out. what a hard thing to have to do, on top of what you must already be dealing with.
my thoughts are with you!
life is good
Are you married? Is your daughter's father in her life? Is another relative close to both of you that you could have this discussion with? If so, I suggest you tell him/her (the father/relative) first and ask him to be involved in telling her. Tell her what you have. Then tell her you are going to have to get some very serious medicine that will do not-so-nice things to your body, like make you very tired and even lose your hair. The most important thing though, is that you make sure she knows you love her and there will ALWAYS Be someone there who loves her, even if you aren't. These situations make children, especially hormone filled teenagers, feel like they are lost and that everything is there fault. Reassure her she did nothing wrong. No one did anything wrong. She doesn't have to do anything to fix it. Never make her feel like she has to take care of you. Remain her mom and let someone else help both of you if it becomes necessary.
rbanzai
There's no "good" way other than to be open and honest. You cannot both tell her and also protect her from the fear and upset she will feel.
Telling my parents I had cancer was the hardest thing I've ever done, and due to a lab mixup I had to tell them TWICE.
One of the best things you can do is think of some small way she can help you, and then let her do it. Even if it's something as simple as her helping pack a lunch for you on treatment days.
You're the sick one and it's ok to act like it. Share info with your daughter so she can both help you when you are low and be happy with you when things are going better.
Talk Dirty to Me =P
omg im so0 sorry to hear that. thats terrible. i dont know what to say but sit her down and tell her straight out, theres no easy way to tell your daughter something like that, just be strong. if you show her your not strong she wont be strong for you either, you have to fight this for you and your daughter and your family. i hope you get better im sorry... you'll be in our prayers
Anna J
I'm sorry to hear you have cancer.
Sit your daughter down and tell her the honest truth and anything else she needs to know. She will probably be upset but let her be involved in everything and tell her you will get through it together.
The very best luck to you.
saved_by_grace
Just sit her down and tell her. There is no easy way. She is going to have a lot of questions so be prepared.
You are in my prayers.....
God Bless!
swangirl
Please just sit down and talk to her. Honesty is definitely the best policy here. Not knowing what's going on can be a lot scarier than the truth.
♪ Pamela ♫
I am so sorry to hear that. Honesty is the best policy and be open to her questions, obviously she will be upset. I wish you and your family all of the best.
Just Tink
When you tell her, tell her that you are going to be around for a very long time because you will be telling her the truth.
Source: I used to be a lab tech.
I will pray for the happiness and well-being of you both.
You will start feeling better soon.
judy b
I was diagnosed with CLL Stage 2 7 years ago. No progression to this date. Be honest with her and make sure she feels that she knows about the support that she has from other adults. I was a single mom for ten years and my son and I sat down at one point and discussed two other adults that we both trusted that he could go to with anything. He was very protective of me and didn't like to worry or upset me. These people must be people that you both have extreme trust in because the agreement is that they will help him with whatever the problem is and not tell me about it. He is now 32 years old never been in trouble and doing great. Children have to know that there are other adults that they can trust because you never what know what can happen and this gave him a sense of security which carried him through to today. Good Luck and God Bless
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